Motherhood isn’t about being, it’s about becoming. At each stage of motherhood, we are beginners. We don’t just become mothers when we give birth; we become mothers as we trudge through all the trial and error, the self-doubt, the worry, the overwhelmingly hard days, and the joy, too.
A trusted friend once told me, “In motherhood, the hard moments sometimes outnumber the beautiful moments, but the beautiful moments always outweigh the hard moments.” I have developed a few strategies to give the perfect moments in motherhood even more weight so they can anchor me through the hard times.
It often seems easier to be the one calling the shots and being in charge of our lives. But what happens when we move over and let God be the driver?
They grow up. They leave home. And then, of course, they come back.
They return bearing bags of dirty laundry, stray socks, T-shirts you’ve never seen before, strange cords for charging various digital devices.
I will forever be grateful to my wise friend, Laney, who, in one life-changing conversation, helped me to start challenging “mom-guilt.”
I would ask myself, “But how? How can I make it every day with pain that is so deep and dark? How do I keep going?” I soon realized I did not have to take it day by day. I could simply do minute by minute, slowly working through the cycle of grief while holding onto hope for a better tomorrow.
Recently I joined a Facebook group designed to help its members realize their goals. I struggled to set a goal that seemed significant enough, but I learned that maybe I didn’t need to.
When I woke up 30 minutes before my alarm went off, I thought, “If I wake Spencer up right now, he could play the game for a little while before it’s time to leave.” Then came a little internal battle: Really? Do you EVER wake up a sleeping child so he can play a video game?
It didn’t matter what I looked like, how much baby weight remained, how dirty the rest of the house was. Everything that meant anything to me in that moment was before me. My dream had come true.
In the spirit of encouraging growth and freedom, I’ve made a list of things I will not fix for my kids this summer…
In today’s podcast, author Rachel Nielson reads four of her articles about concrete ways that she finds hope and fulfillment as a mother, even in the hardest of times.
My children feel the influence of my own mother’s patience, love and sacrifice, through my best attempts to emulate her. Her influence continually fills our hearts with love.