I am a mom who needs a fairly strict schedule with my children, as it brings some element of stability to my chaotic life as a mother. Unfortunately, this reliance on the schedule means that I am not very good at slowing down and enjoying little moments. A few months ago, however, I had a sweet experience with my three-month-old son, Alex, that reminded me that sometimes it is best to just stop, interrupt my thoughts, and enjoy the moment.
During one of Alex’s first feedings of the day, he suddenly stopped eating and started looking around the room. For some reason, I felt very frustrated, thinking, “Great! Now it will take him longer to eat, which means he will nap later, which means…” and there I went, spiraling downward in thoughts of how this small delay was going to mess up his entire schedule and mine.
Suddenly, my thoughts were interrupted by a feeling of softness on my right arm.
I looked down and saw my sweet little boy completely focused on running his fingers up and down my arm. My frustration evaporated into a feeling of fullness and completeness. I was overwhelmed by his tenderness and how, with a simple touch from those tiny fingers, he had managed to stop my never-ending sequence of negative thoughts. A silent voice inside my head whispered, “Enjoy this moment.”
I quickly forgot about all the things that I had previously thought were important to “get done” that morning, realizing that Alex feeling close to me was much more important than the dishes and my to-do list. I found myself relaxed, just being pampered by my little one. I didn’t want to miss any detail from his face, his fingers, and his focused attention on my arm.
Alex hasn’t done that since that one day, and let me tell you that I miss the feeling I experienced while I felt the touch of his tiny fingers. I go back to that moment whenever I feel overwhelmed or simply need to feel better in my role as a mother. I’m so grateful that Alex taught me that sometimes it is best to let go of a perfectly planned day and instead enjoy a perfectly unplanned moment with my children.
I am wired like you a schedule brings calm to my spirit! And I had a similar precious moment with my daughter when she was the same age as your son in this story. I had just finished nursing her in bed and we were snuggled up to each other dozing before my alarm clock (her three year old brother!) woke up. It was such a perfect moment, her body nestled up to mine, sleeping in that perfect way babies do. I wanted nothing more than to stay in that moment forever. I closed my eyes tight and chanted in my head “neverforgetthis neverforgetthis”. Seven years later it is still one of the defining moments of my motherhood journey. I’m so glad you had one too!
Beth, thank you so much for your comment! Alex is barely over a year old but it is nice to know I will remember this and treasure it seven years from now!
Beautiful. Every once in a while I get caught by just how amazingly beautiful each of my children are. It happens in moments that are unpredictable but it takes my breathe away. This past Sunday my five month old started softly playing with my hair. It was amazing. Thank you for sharing this sweet moment. It is the moments like this that are so rewarding.
Shannon, thank you so much by your comment, I totally understand the feeling of just feeling in awe at how beautiful they are!
Oh boy can I relate! Weekdays are mad as I rush home by 6pm, nurse him, cook his dinner, bathe him, read and play with him, and get him to sleep by 8.45pm at the latest.
On days when he doesn’t sleep enough at infantcare, he sometimes needs to sleep while nursing before he eats his solids. I have learnt to let him have a quick nap, enjoying him nestling in my arms and not worry that his bath will be at 7.30 and not 7.15, and that he might sleep at 9pm instead.
And yes, when his soft little hand rests on my arm, strokes it, ir plays with my t-shirt, I just revel in it. And remember that one day, he’ll be too big to do this.
Hermione, it feels good to know that you can relate! Yes enjoy those moments, my Alex is now 15 months and weaned himself about 2 months ago, and let me tell you I miss those sweet moments with him. Eventually they really don’t cuddle as much anymore 🙁