Like adults, children crave love and attention, and I dare say they especially want it from their mothers–their first “true love.” Creating “I Love You” rituals in the home is probably one of the simplest things you can do to yield big results in family connectedness. Unlike other efforts we make as parents that require work, sacrifice, and a certain degree of tolerance, sharing simple “I Love You” rituals is not only easy, but will bring instant joy to both you and your child.
Below is a sampling of some of the fantastic ideas that have been shared on our website for showing younger children just how you really feel. Please take a minute to share your own ideas in the comments section below.
1. Create a secret handshake or other sign that means “I love you,” like squeezing each other’s hands three times or signing (not singing!) “I love you” across a room or ball field.
2. Hugs. Lots and lots of hugs. “We need 4 hugs a day for survival. We need 8 hugs a day for maintenance. We need 12 hugs a day for growth.” (Virginia Satir)
3. Write love notes on decorative paper and hide them under your child’s pillow.
4. Designate certain days of the week as each child’s own personal “compliment day.” Use dinner time or right before bed (if the family gathers at that time) to have everyone tell that child why they are special, appreciated and loved.
5. Put love notes in a lunchbox–even a simple note on a napkin is wonderful!
6. Blow a kiss when dropping off at school.
7. Be ready with a snack and listening ear when your child comes home from school.
8. Ever heard the phrase, “Children spell love, T-I-M-E”? It’s true! Find a way to take your child out on a special one-on-one date, letting them choose the place and activity. Taking them out of school for a special lunch with you is also fun. Birthdays are a great time for this.
9. Look your child in the eye when they are telling you something important to them.
10. Create loving bedtime rituals like snuggling up for books, giving a back rub while listening to calming music, or whispering a “secret” in their ear after tucking them in–something specific that you love about them!
11. Make their favorite dinner or treat when they’ve had an especially tough day, or reached an important achievement.
12. Just say it. Three Simple Words.
Now, before you get overwhelmed thinking every other family out there is having daily love fests, remember that these ideas were submitted one at a time by individual mothers. If you think this list is a little overwhelming, but you’d like to increase the warm fuzzies at your house, just pick one or two things to implement and let the magic begin!
QUESTION: What are your favorite “I Love You” rituals for younger children?
CHALLENGE: Incorporate one or two new rituals into your daily routine, or plan something extra sweet for a special occasion.
Photo by www.freedigitalphotos.net.
Originally posted on February 7, 2012.
Love all the ideas! We snuggle before bed and tell each other Teeny and Moe stories (just a couple random characters we made up together).
`we just give our 2 boys hugs and kisses everyday and simply say “i love you”. we dont have any special rituals, ive tried but they dont want them. they are just happy with hugs and kisses and hearing how much we love them. to them thats all they need.
we have no special rituals at our house. ive tried but my 2 toddlers dont want nothing to do with them. they are happy with hugs and kisses and tickles and cuddles and simply hearing “i love you”.
One meaningful ritual that has grown with us is telling each child, “You are my favorite 14-year-old in the whole wide world!” or “You are my favorite 6-year-old in the whole wide world!” every night at bedtime (and other times when they are leaving or we are apart). It’s always funny when they have a birthday and get older. With five kids, three of which have birthdays within 7 days of each other, I get a week grace-period to remember the new ages. LOL!